Its job time

After just over 4 months of living like Wayne Slob I have succumbed to financial pressures and got myself a job. From Monday I will be working for Hanover Finance in the city centre on a 4 month(ish) contract.

Disappointing, as I vowed to leave the office work back in England, but the stark reality is that Auckland is just too expensive. So for the time being, it's back to the "smart/casual" 9-5 life that we all know and love.

Click here for the regenerated Boundary Park. Probably ready before the new Wembley.

Now back to the trivialities.....

2 most annoying things I've found about NZ so far...

1: horn tooting. Kiwi drivers are terrible, and they appear to want to advertise this by blasting their horns when THEY'RE in the wrong. IDIOTS.

2: the insects that occupy every tree and bush and screech incessantly. not content with giving me the impression I've got tinnitus, one leapt through the open window of the car the other day (whilst moving) and landed on my chest. I may have jumped somewhat. And maybe even let out a little girlie scream.

It's the weekend soon, so I plan to go out, get drunk and take lots of pictures...

Question...

I heard somewhere that there's some sort of scandal involving some back door shenanigans between a pair of premiership footballers.

Discuss.

(Yes, this site is getting more low-brow by the day)

Settling in...

The start of a new week and one where I can no longer put off getting a job. I've properly moved in to my new home (pictures soon I promise) and have no more excuses to be a bone idle layabout.

Fairly tame weekend, just getting my stuff sorted and getting moved in. Went for a meal on Saturday night with my new housemates, Kat, Liz and Ryno (soon to be ex-housemate as he's moving out in a couple of weeks). I could have had the cajun chicken in a smaller portion, but not wanting to look like a weakling I got the full portion - and left most of it. What a ridiculous feed....Lunt, I think you'll be able to dish out quite a few more fatty jibes for a while.

I'm considering doing a weekly worst personalised number plate slot. There are some shockers, namely a 50+ bleech blonde grannie in a mazda convertable with the number plate "2 SEXIE". I beg to differ, love.

Other news, Lost season 2 started on tv here the other week and after a brilliant first episode it's returned to it's frustrating best. Roll on 24 season 5.

And some of you thought these posts would get more boring with time...watch this space tomorrow where I discuss what the hell happened to the New Zealand Curling team in the Olympics.

Big news... (Saturday 11 Feb)

Today has been a good day. It didn't start particularly well - a stinking hangover made the morning pretty difficult. In fact, before I tell you about today I'll fill you in about last night. After work Si picked me up, then Leanne from her work and we went over to the RSA (Returned Services Association) in Onehunga. The people there are sound, a round of drinks cost $9 (£3.50) and snooker, yes snooker, was 50c for 30 minutes (20p). I love working mens clubs. For the sports stat fans among you (Heyesie) I beat Si 90-19 which made up for the pasting I took at tennis. We then went over to Newmarket to a pub call the Cock and Bull, which I'd guess you'd have to say is an english themed pub, where we sank a few pints and an incredibly painful shot of malibu, peach schnaps and vodka and watched the rugby on the telly which ended up....bothered. Then on to the city centre - I'll sum this up briefly...we went to 3 clubs (one of which, Boogie Wonderland, 3 times) and they were all rubbish. I'm sure Auckland must have a good indie club tucked away somewhere but I'm yet to find it.

Aaaanyway, back to the good news. Bought American Pie 2 and 3 for a total of $15 - that's about 6 quid. Bargain.

Also, I found somewhere to live today. I'm actually going to be able to unpack my suitcase and sleep on a proper bed. It's an amazing house in one of the poshest areas of Auckland, it's pretty cheap and I'm sharing with 2 and possibly 3 girls. Someone was smiling on me today.

Pictures and more news to follow soon...

Big ship... (Thursday 9 Feb)

On my usual daily wander when I saw that the QE2 was docked here. This is about as exciting as it gets this week so far

Chocks away...(Sunday 5 Feb)

Greetings from the other side of the world!

I've been here a week now, and I'm getting settled and used to the place. Currently I'm crashing on Si and Leanne's floor whilst I'm searching for somewhere to live. Seen a couple of good places already but I'm still waiting for them to call and offer me the room. That reminds me, I'll have to take my phone in to be checked tomorrow - I think it must be faulty.

Went out on the first night, but as that was a sunday Auckland was pretty quiet. First major night was my first Friday...finally called it a day at 7am and the hangover is still raging (its Sunday evening now).

Today was a first for me - I flew a plane! This was a tad unexpected. Leanne's friends Amy and Kev came a knocking this morning and it turns out that Kev is a pilot. Him, Si and myself headed for Ardmore aerodrome and spent a pretty amazing hour checking out the views from 2000ft above Auckland and pulling 2.5G turns over the water. I can't believe I didn't throw up. Kev let me have the controls for a while too and apart from gaining us a few hundred feet without realising it, I had a fairly trouble free first flying experience. I'm told I've got to start using the term "awesome" in NZ and it definitely applies to this.

"What's my vector, Victor?"

Maverick (Kev)
Goose (Si)

Back to the reality of looking for somewhere to live now.

Just to clear up

I arrived here on Jan 29th, but this is the earliest I could get what I'd wrote on the net. So the dates for each installment so far aren't that accurate.

Arrived at last...

Just a 3 hour flight remained and I take my negative comments about Qantas back. Pretty comfortable and good in flight entertainment. I watched In the Blue, a rubbish film but 2 hours of Jessica Alba in a bikini aint bad, and played a few games. Only problem I had with it was the quality of the staff. No offence to anyone's grandmother that is currently a stewardess with Qantas, but it's not really what I want to be faced with for any great length of time.

So here I am, visa stamped and already the owner of a kiwi bank account.

Melbourne...Part Three

Today, wine tasting was on the agenda. There are several vineyards in the yarra valley, around an hours drive from Melbourne, most of which offer tasting for nowt which is a nice way to sample some of the great wines of the region. Or a great way to get leathered for free if you're on a hen do. Then on the way back, a most unexpected sight...an old man, stood on his balcony in only his y-fronts, watching the traffic go by. Damn my slowness in trying to get the camera out.

In the evening we ate at a favourite haunt of the Kwai's...the Deck. Wow. The best restaurant meal I've had in a long time, and very reasonably priced. For those thinking of paying a visit I recommend the sirloin and chocolate souffle. Not together, obviously. The meal was superb, service top drawer and all for $70 each (around £30).

Stomachs full and sighing contentedly, we moved on to the casino, owned by the freshly deceased Kerry Packer. We stopped for a rest along the way, and I realised this was to show me the impressive display of the fire-breathing water features. Once inside, we briefly flirted with the idea of cash poker tables before we settled on the roulette. Whilst I performed my magic trick of turning a $50 bill into a $100 bill, Ben and Nicola left empty handed. Unlucky.

Fiery fountain

It's only been a flying visit to Melbourne, but to say I'm impressed with the place would be a big understatement. Ben and Nicola have been perfect hosts and the city itself has something for everyone. I'd be surprised if I don't drop anchor here at some point in the future.

How about a bit of aussie buzz word bingo? Guess how many of the following phrases I heard during my few days in Oz...

* GOOD ON YA
* YOU BEAUT
* YOU LITTLE RIPPA
* FAIR DINK'UM
* BONZA
* FLAMING GALAAA
* YOU LONG HAIRED GREENIE LEFT WING YAHOO

5 out of 7 as it happens. And I presume the only way to hear the last 2 would be to meet Alf Stewart in person.

It's been a pretty action packed 10 days and I'm very happy with all that I've managed to do and see. It's also been great to visit James before he left Seoul and Ben and Nicola before they left Melbourne. I've also learnt that to do 2 massive nights on the trot is proving quite difficult these days (I remember when it only took me a couple of days to get over 2 weeks in Kavos). All that remains now is to get that 6th flight of 6 and go to my new home...

Melbourne...Part Two

A cool day today, only 37C. Ben and Nicola had to work so I was alone to go sight-seeing. Top of my list was a tour of the MCG, the most famous and historic cricket ground outside of England. It was a very interesting tour conducted by one of the MCC members and we saw most of the in and outside of the place. One slight shame was that it was being prepped for the Commonwealth Games in March so no cricket pitch and quite a lot of building work was going on. Still, great place though and not too many pom jokes whilst going round (I was the only one in the group).



After this I walked back to the centre for some lunch before heading to sight number 2. In celebration of Australia Day I wanted to go and see the Old Melbourne Gaol. However, due to a slight (180 degree) directional miscalculation I ended up on the wrong side of the city centre. Fortunately though, I was next to the Rialto Towers - a huge building and member of the World Group of Towers (or summat). Along with the likes of Seoul Tower and the Sky Tower, oh and Blackpool tower. Good views of the city, very high, yadda yadda.
Got back to the apartment about 5 minutes ahead of some incredibly heavy showers, lounged about for a bit then headed back into town when Nicola was back from work to meet Ben for drinks.

Ben was in a bar with his work colleagues who made me realise one of the (few) things I miss about office life...gossip and back stabbing. The group thinned out one by one and by midnight it was just me and Ben left standing. And I thought the aussies were supposed to be drinkers? A few vodkas, a dodgy black russian, an unfinished pint and a couple hours of good chat later we were done. Cracking night, although Melbourne was very quiet - this was unusual apparently and we even had no trouble getting into a couple of poncy bars that normally queue round the block.

Melbourne...Part One

It was a poor flight, 10 hours long with little room, no personal telly, rubbish films on and massive queues for the bogs (tip - avoid flying Qantas long haul). I arrived in Melbourne not in the best of condition but that soon changed as I stepped outside. The heat was incredible...27 degrees and just gone 9am. By late afternoon temperatures had peaked at 39.3C - a whole 39.3C hotter than Tokyo.

I was met at the airport by ex-work colleague Ben Kwai who's been on secondement in Melbourne for the last 2 and a half years. He and his wife Nicola live in a lovely 17th floor apartment with great views. I was shown to my fantastic room with double bed, huge windows and plenty of floor space for me to scatter all my clothes and various bits of rubbish.

And so to the city...I arrived on Australia Day and as we were walking through the centre we came across a parade including representitives of buddhism, countries and traditions of Tibet, China, Taipei and of, course, the Australian Ukelele Movement. Braving the heat we moved on to Federation Square where leading Australian tennis player, Aussie Molic (fit) was doing a Q&A. She then went on to hit a few serves on a mini court (pictures of that somewhere don't you worry).

Ben, a weirdo and me

Then we caught a tram to St Kilda, about 15 minutes up the road - a busy beach with plenty going on. Avoiding the heat for a while, we went to Greasy Joe's for some lunch. Kwai tried to coax me into attempting the 'Fat Bastard' - a burger so named due to it's layer of bacon cheeseburger followed by another layer of bacon cheeseburger and then a third layer of bacon cheeseburger. In the end I went for the regular bacon cheeseburger and just about managed it...I challenge anyone to finish the Fat Bastard (Tranter?). Another high point, other than the food, was that the guy who played Malcolm Kennedy in Neighbours was waiting tables. How the mighty have fallen eh? Still, he was chatting up a table of blonde beauties so he's probably fairly content with life. Good news for me is that I've seen a cast member so I can chalk the Neighbours tour off my list of things to do.

After a power nap we went off to the Rod Laver Arena to watch the first mens semi final in the Australian Open tennis. Marko Bagdhaditz (or summat) beat David Nalbandian in 5 sets finally finishing at around midnight. A thrilling game made even more exciting by the pockets of Greek/Cyrpriats supporting the underdog, not at all singing slightly altered football songs.

The aussies are at the forefront of court drying technology

All in all, a great day. Looking forward to tomorrow when I plan to tour the MCG and the Old Melbourne Gaol. Oh, and get pist.

Tokyo

Arriving in Tokyo absolutely knackered and with a touch of the Monday blues, it was quite disconcerting to almost fall asleep on the train and miss my stop, then arrive in Shinjuku station totally baffled. This place has to be the most confusing station in the world. There are 60 exits apparently, ones in to department stores, then west, east, central west, central east etc. Just before I burst in to tears though I found an info desk and got directions to the nearest taxi rank.

The New City Hotel was a recommendation of Smaje and it was perfectly adequate. However, I presume he managed to find penthouse suite with soft pillows and complimentary 'massage' service. I was in a small single, though it had everything I needed and was a good base from which to explore.

I arrived late in the afternoon so after I sorted my stuff out I took a walk into Shinjuku to see what was going on. Once I got to the neon bit there were suddenly thousands of people, all seemingly walking the opposite direction to me. Restaurants galore although none had any English descriptions and only a handful had pictures to help out. The golden arches were drawing me in like the Death Star tractor beam but I managed to lock in the auxiliary power and resist temptation to be a pussy and ventured in to one of the local noodle places. I watched the person before me do the necessary then followed suit - this was because you picked a number on the machine, paid, got a ticket and handed that to the chef. There was no English on the machine, but fortunately the picture outside that looked quite nice had a number next to it so I went with that. Some sort of noodle soup and pork with rice was given to me and it was really good...only Y500 too (about £2.50). I was shattered after this so I wandered back and got my head down.

Tuesday was sight-seeing day. On the recommendation of Haggis, I took the train over to Harajuku where I took a wander down Takeshita Street (snigger) and saw an amazing array of freaks and freak boutiques. On the other side of the station there was the Meiji Jingu shrine - a complete contrast to Takeshita Street, with a tranquil walk through the gardens to the shrine itself, all very relaxing.

Erm, I think I'll go, erm, left

Wednesday morning before my flight was spent in the Shinjuku-Gyeon gardens which according to the Rough Guide are arguably the most beautiful in Tokyo. Being winter, it was pretty bare but still very beautiful indeed and worth the trek to get there.

Pretty Japanese this

Tokyo is a place I would definitely like to see more of and preferably not when feeling totally destroyed. One more thing, on checking my watch it turns out there is no time difference between Korea and Japan. James 1-2 Owen. Ha.

On to Melbourne now...

Seoul...Part Three

The reason for the curfew is that James teaches at an Orphanage on Sundays - if you can call pretending to throw them off a wall, showing them how to play slaps and giving them Chinese burns teaching. The general idea is to get there around midday so it was no surprise that there was no one there when we turned up at 4.15. They were due back soon though so we took a quick trip to the nearby World Cup Stadium. Impressive.

When we got back to the orphanage the little ones were back and full of beans. Well, noodles actually. James was straight in there getting nutmegged by a 7 year old footballer (no change there then). After a short while I was at it too though as I couldn't turn down that many requests for a helicopter. I wish I had though...spinning a young child round by his hands as fast as you can does nothing for a hangover I can tell you. The kids were great though and I really enjoyed our visit.

The kids enjoyed this - honestly.

In the evening we went off to see Seoul Tower - another feat of impressive Korean engineering with views of all around, but stamina was fading fast so we headed back home. Along the way, the biting wind was taking its toll and I claimed that the worst possible pain at that point was to have someone flick your ear. James didn't believe me so invited me to try, which I obviously did and sent James recoiling and near to tears. Etiquette was such that he had to return the favour and after a bit of flinching I held still and he gave me his worst. Christ. It REALLY hurt. I was right though...James 1-1 Owen.

It saddened me to leave Seoul, I really enjoyed it. For James' version of events, follow the link to his blog on the right of the page.

Seoul...Part Two

It was a struggle to get up, but that we did at 2.45. We hadn't wasted the day yet fortunately and we got out pretty quickly to soak up some culture. First stop was the local chemist for hangover cures, then on to a Buddhist temple. Very interesting and weird, but enjoyable. And I felt like I'd live for another 10 years after drinking water from the holy pond (probably not its actual name).

Then we had a wander round Seoul. I thought James had a pretty good route planned as we managed to do and see quite a lot, but it turns out he was just looking for any photo place that would develop in 17 minutes. Still, it took us past a batting cage which made my day. You pop a million won coin into the slot, pick up the baseball bat and start swinging. I'm guessing they weren't 100mph curve balls but they certainly seemed like it, I did manage to connect with a few...one even went in the air, probably straight down mid-on's throat or whatever the baseball equivalent is. What a fantastic way to spend a few minutes.

James then professed to know where the world's greatest orange juice was available. Being the pedant that I am, I was sceptical as sure, it may be good, but how can you say it's the best? The proof is in the drinking though so we went to get some. Well, it pains me to admit it, but James was right. There is no way any orange juice on the planet can beat that. Pure liquid gold.

James 1-0 Owen.

Enough of all this cultural rubbish, lets get on with the night out. We met up with Stuart, a friend of James' and coincidentally another Doncastrian. We went for eats at a tuna restaurant where they serve you slices of raw tuna and various sundries until you either burst and die or walk out. Delicious. Marshall, a Canadian, met up with us after and we went on to the hole in the wall bar where we shared a bottle of vodka. Enough for the night??? Not at all, we met up with another crowd celebrating a birthday and shared another bottle. Enough??? You'd think so, but I'm pretty sure when we went to the club there was more drinking done there. Another great night out and really good to meet another group all of whom seem to share the same drinking stamina (see what I mean about this city?!). James called time on the night at 4am - his Saturday curfew for reasons explained later...

Seoul...Part One

After changing in London and Tokyo, I finally rested in Seoul - a large and confusing place where blowing your nose in public is considered bad form whereas coughing up a greenie and spitting it out in the street is almost compulsory. Fortunately for me though, I had my very own guide in fellow Donny Boy James Creegan.

I arrived late afternoon then spent a short time sat in James' office at Incheon airport where he messed about on the net until safe to leave (I'm assured this is not the norm). A scary taxi ride to James' hotel and a quick change of clothes later we were heading off to Hongdae for a true Korean night out. First of all a restaurant where I almost got the hang of chopsticks but not quite. The food was great, even though I hadn't the first clue about what I was eating. Once that was out of the way it was on to the main point of my trip - the booze.

Having had 2 nights out in Seoul I think it's safe to say that it's a binge drinker’s paradise. You down shots of soju with your meal, drink gallons of dirt cheap makoli (a gritty rice wine with a kick) and you buy a bottle of vodka for your table instead of frequent and frustrating trips to a crowded bar.

We met up with a mate, or should I say buddy, of James' - Tim the American (to give him his full name). Tim possesses an unusual quality for a yank in that he's highly proficient in the art of sarcasm. We hit a variety of bars its safe to say you wouldn't find in England - from a strange bed/sofa type place where you sit in a booth surrounded by curtains (not as seedy as it sounds) to a place where you sit cross-legged on the dusty floor around a sunken pond in the middle. This experience was made even better when a girl trying to get past us stumbled and landed in the pond. We laughed. The fish did not.

The night ended in a Noraebang (if you want proper spellings you won't get them here) after bumping into a couple more people who I presume someone knew. Noraebangs are karaoke places where you rent out a room by the hour with a couple of sofas in and a huge karaoke machine. Then you blast out the likes of "Don't Stop Me Now" (a personal favourite of me and the boy who's skin fell off), "Living on a Prayer" (the choice of Tim) and "Forget About Dre" (surprisingly well performed by James).

Jet-lag, schmet-lag...we got back to James' hotel at 7am.



Here Comes the Sun performed to perfection by me and James.